Part 2 - Day 29 - I WILL NOT GIVE UP!!

OK, so it's been a couple weeks since I've posted on here.  I really can't believe it's been that long, but here we are.

I've pretty much maintained my weight since I last wrote.  Actually I gained two pounds overall:

You might say that's not too bad considering the holidays, and I didn't totally go off of the deep end, but I certainly have not kept up with my goal of losing 50 pounds in 90 days.  I didn't record what I ate every day either.  I'd say probably half the days I've been fasting most of the day, until late afternoon/evening, and the other half I've been eating a few bites here and there throughout the day, then more at dinner/in the evening.  There have been one or two days that I have just lost control and eaten way too much.  I have continued to weigh myself most days, and that I am sure has contributed to me not gaining more than I did.

So here we are.  I can't go back and change what I've done, do I give up, start again, or still try to reach my goal?  I am certainly not going to give up.  I thought about starting again, but for me at least, I know from experience that each time I "start again", it lessens how seriously I take the goal.  If I start again today, what keeps me from just giving up again in a couple weeks and starting again, etc.  I guess in a way that would work and over time I would lose weight as long as I don't gain between efforts, but that doesn't feel satisfying for me.  I think the best course of action is to keep to my goal, and with determination and fortitude, go forward and make it happen!

So how will I accomplish this?  Well, you may know that I've done long term fasts before, and I know they work and really improve how I feel.  They also improve self control and can be spiritually very beneficial.  There's some history of using very long term fasting (months with no food) for curing morbid obesity, before the advent of bariatric surgery, with some success.  So my plan is simply to fast until I am below the red line.  I'll be taking vitamins of course, and drinking plenty of water, but other than that no calories until I am below the line.

So how long will I be fasting?  I'll fast as long as it takes, but according to the math, my daily calorie expenditure is right around 3500 Calories, so I can expect to lose about a pound a day.  I'm about 10 pounds over my goal right now, and my goal goes down about a half a pound a day.  So we're looking at about a 20 day fast to get back on track.  I actually think I'll lose a little faster than that based on past experience, and based on the fact that some amount of the weight I've gained is water weight and will come off pretty quickly when I stop eating salty foods.  I think that however long it takes, it will be worth it!

I did a 10 day fast at the end of my first 50 pounds in 90 days challenge in order to make my goal, so this will be one step up from that.  If I start to see really adverse health effects from the fast then we'll address it and go from there, which may look like a couple of 10 day fasts, or alternate day fasting, or something like that.  But unless there is a crisis, I know I can and will fast until I'm back on track.

So there you have it.  We'll see how this goes.  I've wanted to do this longer term fast for a while to get back on track, but I haven't written it down.  And we know that a goal not written down is just a wish.

Part 2 - Day 11 - To act, and not to be acted upon.

I was traveling for work today, so I don't have a weight.  It is just for one night, so I'll be back and have a weight tomorrow.

As part of my travels today, I was at an event for work and they had a social lunch.  I did eat lunch there, which was fajitas, but I had quite a small portion, and was feeling really good that I kept control, and I actually had energy for the rest of the day because I didn't overeat.  I didn't get a picture of the lunch due to the setting I was in.

On the drive home I stopped for gas and went in for a diet soda, and ended up getting a pack of crackers and a Slim Jim as well that I ate on the drive home.  So that didn't make me feel better.  I probably should have just got some water.

When  I got home we had dinner, which was also fajitas coincidentally:

I didn't actually eat all of that, I just ate the one wrapped up fajita and the salad.  I did not eat the other pile of chicken & peppers or the rice or noodles.

Later in the evening, I did also eat about 1/4 of a bag of chocolate chips,which now that I look at the bag is about 450 Calories of mindless eating.

I'm writing this the next morning, and thinking back to what happened.  I think I had a good weight loss, was feeling really good about my position, and let my guard down.  I think we all have a tendency to want to have time where we can just relax and let our guard down for a while, but I think we need to fight that tendency.  A day of good weight loss is precisely the time when we have a great opportunity to compound that success by continuing strong.  I think we'll be happier in the long run if we choose discipline, all the time, and not look for opportunities to "let go" or lose control.  I think sometimes we think if we can put ourselves in an environment that can control us then we don't need to control ourselves, but then we leave our success up to our surroundings, which can change and are never ideal.  A key principle here is that we ought to act, and not be acted upon.  That is, we ought to choose what we are going to do, in every situation, and not allow circumstances to control what we do.

That's it for today.  I'm feeling really good and much more committed now that I have a clearer understanding and determination to move forward.  Never give up!  Keep moving forward!

Part 2 - Day 10

Another good weight loss, finally back under the line.  I'm really happy about that:

Today I fasted again, and had tomato and pepper soup for dinner:

So I am feeling pretty good and have a lot of energy, at least compared to how I was feeling when I was eating a lot.  I have been a little sick the last day or so, but I think I handelled it better and recovered quicker due to my better diet and fasting.

I am surprised by the large weight loss after the gain I had over the last few days. I think the gain may have been due to the lack of sleep and large amount of stress I was under earlier in the week.  Also, the large loss may be due to a few good nights of sleep and possibly my sickness.  I may be a little dehydrated, making my weight lower.  We'll see how things go as I re-hydrate and normalize.

Part 2 - Day 9

Well, I finally saw a pretty good loss:

The fasting yesterday and the soup for dinner paid off.  I think I must have had some water weight on as well.

So tonight I had some more soup:

My tooth is still bothering me, so this was a good choice.  I also had a couple of chocolates from a box I got for the wife.  At some point I'll need to stop getting the ext

Part 2 - Day 7

Well, not a great loss for the first week:

I'll definitely need to step it up and eat cleaner if I am going to make the challenge!

I know I can do it!

I did fast today until dinner.  We had brocolli soup and rolls.  I also had a handful of peanuts:

I'm really tired today from being sleep deprived, but I'm going to go to bed early and try to get some good rest.  Fingers crossed!

Part 2 - Day 6

Well, another gain today:

I guess it's not super surprising after last night.  I did eat some salty foods, so my water weight is probably up, and I still didn't get much sleep, probably 3-4 hours last night.  I'm not sure how much that affects things, but I feel like it does for me.  Hopefully tonight I'll get a good night's rest.

Today I did OMAD (yay!), and we had fajitas for dinner:

After dinner I did also have some pudding and some peanuts.  I really need to get in gear and stop snacking after dinner.  It's hard after a long day, when I want to relax a bit and let my guard down, but I have to stay strong in order for this goal to happen!  I know I can do it!

Part 2 - Day 5 -

Quite a bit of a gain today:

I think I must have eaten more yesterday than I thought.  I guess it's true that when you just eat here and there all day, it can be easy to lose track and eat more than you imagined. 

The other thing that could be going on is that I pulled an all-nighter last night to get some work done.  Doing that is getting progressively harder as I age, although when I am eating right on OMAD it becomes easier.  In either case, I seem to remember that lack of sleep affected my weight before, so that could be contributing on the day-to-day fluctuation here.

So today I did fast, so that's good.  Tonight my tooth was still hurting quite a bit, so I made some soup for dinner:

It was canned tomato soup, then I added some peppers and onions that I roasted along with some hot sauce and left over green beans, all blended up.  It was actually really good.  I wish I could say that was all I ate, but I did have more after that.  Once gain, just eating here and there, but I know it was too much.  I need to get better at not eating after dinner when I do fast.  One step at a time.  Keep moving forward, never give up!

Part 2 - Day 4 - Long day

I had another really nice weight loss day:

I didn't fast today, but didn't eat three meals either.  Just a bit here and there during the day.  It's the weekend, so I was home.  I didn't really eat any meals.  That is probably not the best way to eat for the day, mostly because looking back it's really hard for me to tell what/how much I really ate.  I didn't go crazy for sure, I never got really full, just like I said a bite here an there.  I tried to do mostly high protein, I snacked on nuts and had some chicken.  I did have some leftover brownies from the birthday and some popcorn we had for a family movie this evening.  Like I said, hard to say if I ate too much or not.  We'll see what the scale says tomorrow.  I know I'll have to be stricter as I go on, just had a kind of lazy day today home with the family.

Tomorrow is a new day!  I'm definitely going to OMAD tomorrow.  I'm still feeling really good.  I know I can do this challenge, and I'm excited to see my continued progress.  Tomorrow I'll go ahead and make a weight chart with my new goal line, and calculate the number of calories I should be eating per day so I keep myself accountable better.

Part 2 - Day 3 - Feeling good!

Lost about another pound, so that's great!

Today was my wife's birthday, so we had steak and potatoes for dinner:

I did not totally fast all day, but I didn't eat much before dinner.  My tooth was still hurting quite a bit, so I didn't have much of an apetite, and I was only able to eat about half of that steak.  We also had brownies and ice cream for dessert.  I mostly just had ice cream 'cause my tooth was hurting after the steak.  I wouldn't be surprised if I'm up tomorrow, though, because that was a lot of food either way.

I am feeling really good, though.  It's amazing how fast I start to feel good when I start doing good on my diet.  Also, my belly gets smaller almost immediately just from not being full all of the time, so that feels good.  I have more energy from not being full all the time, too.  I had been in a cycle where I ate something early in the day and felt pretty lethargic all day because of it.  When I don't eat until dinner then I don't feel that sluggishness throughout the day.

Part 2 - Day 2

Good loss for the second day:

I did fast all day until dinner.  It actually wasn't too bad.  I had a really busy day at work, so that really helps to not feel hungry.

My tooth is still in a lot of pain from my dental work yesterday, so for dinner it was just tomato soup and pudding:

The pudding I made with a protein shake instead of milk to try to get more protein in my diet, and it was a sugar free pudding mix.  It didn't turn out so good, so I didn't eat all of it.  I also had a small milk shake later in the evening when I took the family out for ice cream after a band concert.

So things are going good.  I am surprisingly really looking forward to this journey!  I am already feeling better and more confident, and it's only the second day.  How could it get any better than this?!

Part 2 - Day 1

Well, today is the day that I start again!  You didn't think I was going to give up did you?? Never give up, keep moving forward!

I know I've said it before, but today I am committed.  I am tired of staying where I am.  I have gained back and maintained about half the weight I lost on my first 50 pound in 90 day challenge, so here is where I am today, right at 275 lbs:

I think the reason I didn't keep losing, and indeed gained some back, is a combination of things.  I think the most prevalent is that I just got comfortable.  I was really happy with my new weight, it felt great to have that success, all of my clothes were fitting, and I was feeling really good.  All of the reasons I wanted to lose weight (clothes not fitting, shortness of breath, etc.) were either eliminated or much improved.  With that came complacency.  Then, very gradually, the weight crept back on.

I'm just to the point now that, while I'm not back to my original weight, some of my clothes are starting to not fit again, and I am starting to feel less energetic again.  I never did reach my "final" goal weight, and I would very much like to accomplish that.  That eventual "final" goal weight is about 180 pounds, but for now I'm going on a journey to 225 by losing 50 pounds in the next 90 days.

I'm going to update here daily with what I eat, and what I am doing to stay motivated.  There are things I want to do that I just can't do very well at this weight like mountain hiking, skiing, sports with the kids, etc.  In the end, I just want to be here longer for my kids, to see them grow up and have their own families.  I hope these more meaningful motivators will keep me on target for the long haul.

Today I spent most of the day in the dentist office fixing a cracked filling/tooth.  So I didn't eat much, mostly soft stuff like a couple protein shakes, some pudding, and some yogurt.  My primary eating plan is going to be intermittent fasting as before, along with counting calories to match my BMR and deficit needed to lose the weight.

I am really excited for this journey.  I know I can do it.  Let's get started!